On Consciousness

I have a new ADULT blog entry about using the Aneros to explore anal pleasure for men who don't recognize anal stimulation as pleasurable: Aneros Play

This is from a journal entry dated Monday August 8, 2011 - on a flight to attend Erotic Temple at Wildwood:

I was reflecting on trying to explain my perspective on being, and how words either are hard to come by or are completely misleading.

I begin by noticing that everything I perceive, my entire experience of reality happens within this body. That conjures the image of a miniature person sitting inside the brain watching a big screen TV. That's obviously not the case, not even figuratively.

Somehow my experience is the perceiving, and maybe I am this perceiving. After the perception, the experience produces thoughts that I perceive. From theses thoughts, I build an intellectual understanding of the world.

But I am not my understanding, I am the perceiving. I am not my identity, the story I believe about who I am. My consciousness comes and goes and changes from day to day, but I remain unchanged.

I am not my experience, but the experiencing of my experience.

I always need to make a leap at this point. As I have the capacity to perceive, everything in the universe has the same potential. I eat food. The food is incorporated into my body and brain. Does it then gain the ability to perceive or has it always had this ability? Old particles/molecules from my body/brain return to the world. Everything is dynamic and changes, but everything is alive because God is omnipresent - whatever that means to you.

We were never kicked out of the Garden of Eden. We're still there, we just can't perceive it easily with thinking in the way. I am the part of the universe perceiving itself. I am God perceiving God in all the forms I can take. Words fall short - as always.