Silence

The outer circle of the Three Circles Ritual is called Silence. I went to three circles last night and intentionally stayed in the outer circle. This was difficult for me. I use this circle to hold space for the men in the other two circles. There are things to learn in this circle that you can't experience in the others.

Sitting in the outer circle allowed me to see the perfection of everything that was happening. I would drift into judgment and then see that it was perfect exactly the way it was. It was also nice to see that the ritual was working just fine without me being in the middle of it. I could see that if I wasn't there, that they would have done fine without me.

Being in the outer circle, I also acted as the voyeur, charging everyone's inner exhibitionist. I often get a charge watching someone doing something and then expressing that through breath or through my expression. I tried to observe the entire ritual, trying to emulate God's perspective - looking at all the men perfectly loving themselves and learning how to interact more deeply and with more presence. Our culture has neutered us, and the group of men in front of me were healing from that - rediscovering their animal maleness and learning how to embrace it completely. It was among the most beautiful things I have ever seen.

Finally, sitting consciously in the circle of Silence, I discovered a new freedom. I recognized that I was uncomfortable, afraid that I would be judged by not participating (even though I was). In that, I found the freedom of being able to sit and witness and the perfectness of doing that. I discovered anything I could do would be perfect. Anything I didn't do was perfect. Together at that time, we were all perfectly complete and also overcoming our erotic wounds and also learning new ways of being – a unity in contradictions, completely perfect.