If I am willing to accept the things I fear most (for my higher good) - the things that I think would be worst - I must also be willing to accept the things that I feel good about that are around me all the time. Freedom, prosperity, fulfillment, power, happiness.
I am OK. There are options for what I can do, but I am OK. If there's a reason for raising my energy level, it's to realize that I'm OK. It's one critical piece of information that I often forget.
I can't spend all my time preparing myself emotionally for the worst if I don't also prepare for the best. I dwell on avoiding what I don't want to experience. What do I want?
I want knowledge about what I want. I want my life to align with my highest potential in the eyes of God. I want the time and money to go to more workshops. I want to be free of money.
I let myself feel how it feels to be OK. How can I perpetuate that into my daily life?
More than that. How do I learn how to leave my cage? How do I wake up and focus on what's important while ignoring what is not true? I want to escape right now - back into the comfort of my cage.
First, I forget about what makes money and what doesn't make money. Money is the tool of the wealthy to subjugate the general population. Money is a cult.
How do I serve the community and society. I am not a socialist, but capitalism seems corrupt. The more people who genuinely contribute to the welfare of the Earth and all her inhabitants – the less we need money and government. The system now favors the corrupt(*See comment below). Maybe this lack of government focus could be called idealism. Idealism is incorruptible, so long as it focuses on the welfare of the whole. Do not resist anyone or anything as that only empowers what you resist. Do only good. Become stronger so that you are more able to do only good and persecute no one. This is the birth of freedom espoused by liberals and the obsolescence of government espoused by conservatives.
To be true to myself, I need to be faithful to the ideal of sex work and erotic healing which will land me in jail at some point. It would make me an outcast among many who do not understand and a hero to those who do. This is my religions faith. It's unfair for the faith of one to trump another.